Is it worth hiring a babysitter?
Should you hire a nanny for a toddler under one year old?
How to do it correctly if your answer is yes? Mothers share their experiences, both positive and negative, and an experienced child psychologist comments on possible options.
In an ideal world, the mother of a small child spends all her time with him, smiling happily and photographing all his small huge achievements. Mom calmly manages to play with the baby, and prepare amazingly delicious dinners, and clean the house. She has a good mood and financial well-being, which allows her to be calmly on maternity leave. However, even with such a magical scenario, sometimes the need for a nanny may arise: go to a friend's birthday party or fly to rest to the warm sea, and just exhale and spend the day alone or with a friend, play with older children, if any.
The reality, as a rule, is more prosaic: many modern women, even at home, work almost immediately after giving birth - remotely or being freelance. Someone goes to work for part of the day, while others, for various reasons, work the prescribed eight hours away from the baby. The reasons are clear, and with all this, the institution of grandmothers has practically become obsolete in our time. In this case, you definitely cannot do without a nanny - and she must spend several hours a day with the child every day. And even the night, as it happens.
Mothers share their stories: how they managed to hire a nanny in London for a child under one year old, what came of it and what advice they can give, based on their experience, to other parents.
"Babysitting is our best investment"
Inna, 35 years old, mother of two daughters 5 and 2 years old:
- We decided to hire a babysitter in London to live in our big house and did it even before the birth of our youngest daughter, so that the nanny could establish contact with all of us. The eldest daughter goes to kindergarten, my husband works on a rotational basis, and I am an interior designer. In my profession, you cannot afford to stop working - clients need constant contact, and I have spent too much time and effort to acquire a solid base. And I can work right from home, all I need is silence and my laptop. A couple of times a week I go to a meeting or to the shops to pick up the right items or materials on the spot.
We selected the nanny according to recommendations - I initially wanted a Filipina, I had a similar very positive experience with my older child, however, Milochka was two and a half at that time. Now, when Lesia is already two, our Joe continues to live with us - and I do not have a soul in her. She speaks good Russian and is fluent in English.
Our nanny has a serious medical education received in the States, and, most importantly, she really adores children. And they pay her the same.
Joe takes great care of the girl - he does massage, bathes, feeds, and now plays with her. We take her with us on all trips.
I still continue to breastfeed my younger ones. I also try to work on a “rotational basis”: four hours in the morning, then I play with my daughter or we walk together, and Joe is preparing lunch at this time, then I sit down at the computer during the daytime sleep and stay there until 6 pm. By the time the eldest returns from the garden, I try to finish everything. Everything that I do not have time to do during the day, I finish in the evening, when the children go to bed.
Now we are thinking about a third child - we really want a boy. Joe will stay with us, of course. It costs us a hefty amount every month, but it's the best investment I've ever made. In the health of all my family members and in my own peace. An opportunity for career growth and professional success.
I advise all doubters - a nanny is very necessary. Mom gets the opportunity to do what she loves and earn money, the child is under professional supervision, everyone is happy.
"Even to the enemy, I would not wish his children to grow up with a nanny and we don't wanna to find a nanny in London ." Arina, 37 years old, three children 1.5, 5 and 9 years old:
- My experience is very sad. I tried to hire a nanny for my two children - my ex-husband and I live in different cities, the children are with me, I work as a financial controller in a large corporation. The decree is suicide for me, I cannot and do not want to stay at home with my child. I feel that I am starting to become dull and become a quarrelsome, wrapped up aunt, and even from work I am only allowed to take care of my child for six months.
With the middle child, I hired a nanny when my son was six months old. At first everything was good and smooth: Valentina (name has been changed - Approx. Ed.) Seemed a decent and calm woman. After a couple of months, it turned out that she had time to steal money and food in small change, sleep with my husband when I was in the next room with the elder.
Naturally, I wrote a statement against her, now she is in prison - it turned out that the woman is generally on the international wanted list, she left the neighboring country, because there she was "shone" in prison for fraud.
My mother was with Lesha before he entered the kindergarten. She protested, but there were no options. My husband and I then divorced, of course.